Kancelář pro uvádění (nejen) románových příběhů na pravou míru aneb Criticism for dummies

Pamatujete si na Saturninovu kancelář? Tak přesně něco podobného, jen s anglo-americkou literaturou a její kritikou obecně jsme dneska s kamarádkou vlivem očividně přeplněné kapacity mozku v rámci blížících se státnic začaly spontánně dávat dohromady na Cvrlikovníku (a nakonec i na Xichtoknize, kde se připojili další). :D

Heslem našeho kritického směru je Upřímně, stručně a výstižně a toto jsou perly, které jsme zatím daly dohromady.

The Scarlet Letter - Secret adultery can quickly become very public pregnancy.

Othello - Women are treated like a piece of shit.

The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - Kids, do not shoot sea birds who might be Jesus.

Eveline (Dubliners) - Dublin sucks. Ireland sucks. Everything sucks.

The Cement Garden - Sigmund Freud appreciatively clapping in the distance.

Hamlet - The side effects of Oedipal complex: Falling in love with your mother may kill you.

Atonement - Hide your porny correspondence from nosy children really carefully.

Catch-22 - Fly, you fools!

The Great Gatsby - Nick's toootally heterosexual praising of Gatsby's toootally heterosexual pink suit.

To His Coy Mistress - Naah, give up man, you are not getting laid.

Song of Myself - I'm the king of the wooorld!

The Jewbird - Who put the LSD to their dinner?!

The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock - I'm tired of being a looser, I just wanna be a pretty girl instead.

A Family Supper - My life sucks. I'm gonna kill my kids. Or maybe not. Dunno. Lol.

Salome - I like fucking and cutting heads. And right now I am done with the fucking.

The Wuthering Heights - Leggo my ego!

The Bloody Chamber - Let me be your sugar daddy. Or I will make you.

Frankenstein - "Victor, what do you wanna be when you grow up?" "God."

A Rose for Emily - Nobody told me living with a corpse was wrong.

Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit - I want that pussy so bad my mum tried to exorcise me.

Walden - Fuck you all, I'm gonna be a hermit.

The Picture of Dorian Gray - Victorian Instagram filters, aka I want to be a hottie, done so wrong.